Deciding the 60 Blog

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Every story has an end, but in life, every end is a new beginning.

I met a friend for dinner tonight who is going through a hard time.  She has decisions to make about things in her life….work, relationships, family.  Having never been in her situations, I listen and offer some platitudes.  Sometimes, I think her choices are obvious and sometimes I can’t see the forest for the trees.

We all have choices.  John Shipp said You either get bitter or you get better.  It’s that simple.  You either take what has been dealt to you and allow it to make you a better person, or you allow it to tear you down.  The choice does not belong to fate.  It belongs to you.

My friend has dealt with one situation for almost two years.  In my opinion, living with this decision for two years has given her insight and heartbreak.  But I think she’s now at the point to do away with the problem.  More heartbreak, to be sure, but freedom and less worry will follow.

How to make a big decision?  In my friend’s situation, for instance, she could solve her difficult situation by pretending to give advice to a friend.  She could ask an imaginary friend with a similar disposition and try to think of how to approach a conversation with him or her.  Picture the type of questions to ask, think about the various risks, and come up with a few things to research.  It would take some mental gymnastics, but it’s worth it to at least try.

Or perhaps she could channel her inner wise woman.  She could picture herself as a wise old woman and pose the question to the imaginary person. The answer may come easy.

I know it’s easy for me to say, since I don’t live in her shoes, but sometimes we just need to make a decision and move forward.

 

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