I hate it when people are at your house and ask, “Hey, do you have a bathroom?” and I’m just like …. “no, not at all, we just s**t in the yard.”
Shopping is an enjoyable experience for most. Either online or in-person. Who doesn’t need to shop for something once or twice a week?
In the May 2017 issue of Real Simple, under the “Little Helpers” column, was a listing of six “smart products to make your day easier.” A pet camera for $100, so you can watch your cat or dog via real-time video, and even use a laser so you can play from afar.
A dish to help you make the perfect poached eggs. It’s only $14, and it’ll pay for itself after skipping two trips to Denny’s. Ouch-free goggles for kids (“even little kids can put it on by themselves!”) and edible dessert stickers.
The five products listed above will certainly make your day easier. And they’re smart. But the one product that stands out to me is for sitting. On your butt. In the bathroom.
An easy-to-install bidet can now be yours for under $85. The description tells me you can add a “hotel-like luxury and cut back on toilet paper.” It fits on most standard two-piece toilets and can be connected to the tank’s water supply to “deliver a cleansing stream.” No, just no.
This is not something you’d buy for the couple who just moved into a custom-built home on the hill. They likely installed an elaborate Japanese toilet system in the master bathroom before they moved in. No, this sounds like the gift you’d get someone who just moved into a new condo. It’s small, inexpensive, and your friend, the new condo owner, needs to start saving money on toilet paper to help make the mortgage payment.
But wait. It gets even crazier. This product is sold online because, really, who wants to go to Home Depot and ask a stranger for a detachable bidet? You can buy this new product, called THE TUSHY, at tushy.me. Really. I can’t even bring myself to get on that website to see what other products they may offer. If you check it out, let me know. I’ll be in the bathroom reading a magazine.